Guide to Being a Band Wife

So when I found out C was in the marching band, I was like "meh, whatever... I mean, I know they march around on the field during halftime and no one watches...and that's it..." But once I started dating him, I got an exclusive insider look into the world of marching band, and now I'm going to share that fascinating world with you, per R's request! Yay! You lucky people, you! And to make it even more interesting, I'll sprinkle pictures of Gus throughout!

Okay, so the first thing you should know about band is that it's not just a hobby or extracurricular. It's a lifestyle to the band people (bandies, I call them), and they don't understand why the rest of us didn't "do band". Be careful when these conversations occur. Explain why you didn't using a phrase like "didn't have time", as opposed to a face like Gus's below and a phrase like "because band is for nerds?"

Come on, son.

You may feel offended during theses conversations, like your choice of school activity was sub-par or loser-ish. It's okay, that is a normal feeling around some. Just make sure you don't apologize for not doing band, or you'll be apologizing for the rest of your life. They also like to throw in comments like "band taught me so much," "band made me a better person," and "band brought me friends". These are all true for them, so don't scoff, but feel free to change the conversation topic as soon as possible when you get bored. Gus is pro at this:

Another thing you may  not know about band is it takes a buttload of time (and yes, buttload is a real word). Besides the practices and games, they also have competitions (that I never knew existed until I started dating C) and they hang out all the time just because that's who all their friends are. If you're dating a bandie, feel free to skip some of those activities. They will use lots of jargon that will make no sense that can get tiring to listen to after awhile. Make your significant other skip too. It will be good for him to get out into the real world for awhile. It might make him look like Gus below, but it will be for his own good. Really.

There, there.

Something else you may not know about bandies is that they need all sorts of specialized equipment, like little music stands that attach to their instrument and special-cut music pages and the little folders they go in, as well as special gloves, shoes, and a uniform that will look terrible up close. Don't be alarmed. It'll look better from a distance... hopefully. When C wears his this year it looks like he's a little five-year-old trying on his dad's shirt. But I'm assured it'll look good far away? I guess if good means 40 pounds heavier, than okay...

Closest I could find to a marching band uniform...

Also, once a year in the summertime they will have a "band camp", where they learn their new songs for the next year and learn how to march around and make shapes and stuff. As far as I can tell, they also want to win something called a "spirit stick", decorate it, and then have it stolen and burned (???), have push-up contests (C won...?), suck up to their leaders by bring them shaved ice, get majorly sunburned and chapped lips, and eat out a lot. I don't get it. I was like Gus and Shawn below when C would tell me what they did every day when he came home for lunch (yay for being poor newlyweds!)

Good things still came out of band camp, though. C told me "They should really make a support group for band wives" and I was like "Dude, I've already got one. Netflix!!!"  I got really into a show called Arrow which is fantastic. Season one's on Netflix now, with season two coming on soon! I also got a lot further on my cross stitch and made cookies that the section thoroughly enjoyed. Point me. 

So in conclusion, don't hate the bandies like I used to. They're quirky, a little weird, nerdy, and somewhat socially awkward, but most of them are pretty nice, at least in my experience. Just... ignore the really weird ones, and you'll be okay. 

Because I can't think of a way to use these other memes and they're fantastic, I'll just put them at the end here.

What I like to sing to C when he has to get up early for band camp

Bonus Lassie meme:

What I say to people that say "You really should've done band!"
Haha, I really would not have done well in band. No joke. 

-K