Alpha and Beta
Hello all you reader people. How's it going? (Rhetorical, please don't answer out loud at your computer.) I've been doing well, just getting back into school, work, etc. It's been pretty so-so, I'm not home a whole ton because I'm always at school or working. But I have spent enough time in my new apartment complex to figure out who the alphas and the betas are. Confused? Allow me to explain.
Alpha male: The "it" guy. Everyone wants this guy. You all know one of them, and you all want him because that's just the way it goes. Everyone wants the alpha, that's why he's the alpha.
Beta male: The "it" guy's friends. He hangs out with Alpha because he knows he can pick up the slack because let's face it, Alpha can't date all the women, and inevitably leaves a trail of broken hearts and floods of tears wherever he goes. Betas are around to take care of the ones that Alpha deems not acceptable.
Gamma male: These are the guys who all band together and play Rock Band late at night because they don't know what else to do. These guys are the ones that look at the Alphas and wish they could be like them, but can't because they don't know how to talk to women/don't care to learn. So weekend after weekend, the lowly Gammas wander through life, wondering when it's going to get better.
So there are your male categories. The females are:
Alpha female: This is the girl that meets a guy, decides he's the one after that one meeting, and pursues him to no end until he gives up and marries her or pushes her off a cliff. You all know the Alphas, they're all giggly and happy and are strangely obsessed with Pinterest and having lots of "guy friends".
Beta female: The Beta female is the one who waits around until the boys get tired of Alpha Female always getting in their way and making it so no other girls will talk to them. They are "just friends", the girls that are always around when Alphas depart for the latest and greatest Alpha male. Betas can usually get the guy, but it takes a lot of patience and effort.
Gamma female: These are the ones that spend Saturday nights watching old reruns of Friends or Seinfeld on their laptops with their earphones in, wondering why they don't have a date/friends/life. It's okay, Gammas. You can always go out and meet someone if you really want your situation to change. Heck, go find the Gamma Male's apartment and join in on their chorus of "Livin' On A Prayer". I'm sure they'll enjoy it.
And yes, before you start getting all antsy on me, these are just general categories. I'm sure nobody fits perfectly into any of them, but you can kind of tell where you lie. I'm on the spectrum between Beta and Gamma female. I'm trying to get more Beta and less Gamma, but like anything worth anything, it takes a lot of work. (Do you like how that got all deep right then. Oh yeah. Just take a moment and appreciate that.)
Later,
K
Alpha male: The "it" guy. Everyone wants this guy. You all know one of them, and you all want him because that's just the way it goes. Everyone wants the alpha, that's why he's the alpha.
Beta male: The "it" guy's friends. He hangs out with Alpha because he knows he can pick up the slack because let's face it, Alpha can't date all the women, and inevitably leaves a trail of broken hearts and floods of tears wherever he goes. Betas are around to take care of the ones that Alpha deems not acceptable.
Gamma male: These are the guys who all band together and play Rock Band late at night because they don't know what else to do. These guys are the ones that look at the Alphas and wish they could be like them, but can't because they don't know how to talk to women/don't care to learn. So weekend after weekend, the lowly Gammas wander through life, wondering when it's going to get better.
So there are your male categories. The females are:
Alpha female: This is the girl that meets a guy, decides he's the one after that one meeting, and pursues him to no end until he gives up and marries her or pushes her off a cliff. You all know the Alphas, they're all giggly and happy and are strangely obsessed with Pinterest and having lots of "guy friends".
Beta female: The Beta female is the one who waits around until the boys get tired of Alpha Female always getting in their way and making it so no other girls will talk to them. They are "just friends", the girls that are always around when Alphas depart for the latest and greatest Alpha male. Betas can usually get the guy, but it takes a lot of patience and effort.
Gamma female: These are the ones that spend Saturday nights watching old reruns of Friends or Seinfeld on their laptops with their earphones in, wondering why they don't have a date/friends/life. It's okay, Gammas. You can always go out and meet someone if you really want your situation to change. Heck, go find the Gamma Male's apartment and join in on their chorus of "Livin' On A Prayer". I'm sure they'll enjoy it.
And yes, before you start getting all antsy on me, these are just general categories. I'm sure nobody fits perfectly into any of them, but you can kind of tell where you lie. I'm on the spectrum between Beta and Gamma female. I'm trying to get more Beta and less Gamma, but like anything worth anything, it takes a lot of work. (Do you like how that got all deep right then. Oh yeah. Just take a moment and appreciate that.)
Later,
K
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